Patience is a funny thing.
Sometimes illusive, sometimes inescapable.
There are days when I am filled with so much endless patience that nothing can bother me. And yet, either that same day, or another, I can't seem to be patient in waiting for something.
My students, I think, take up all of my patience. Children in general have dominion over it. I can give out storehouses upon storehouses of patience to them, and then turn around and have none for the adult in my way.
People that are friends can have bunches of it at a time, mostly.
People that I don't particularly like can have tiny bunches at a time.
I'm sitting here and I have to wait for an object that I want to come in the mail. I know that it should come tomorrow, and yet I want it to come today.
This morning, at work, I had plenty of patience for the students who did not have on their listening ears.
These are just simple thoughts.
Something about today made me stop and look around.
Nothing about it was out of the ordinary and none of it was particularly exciting or fun.
Just... noticeable.
I stopped and looked around and took a deep breath. Then went back to work.
Well, I sort of went to work.
I was at my job today. Then I came home and slept. I had been existing on 3 hours of sleep. But I just didn't wake up until 5. That's not ok.
Seeing as how I have a past due paper that MUST be in tomorrow by 5. Along with the need to write 25 things about Richard III.
And on top of all of this, with the worst timing, is a writer's block.
The Bane of My Existence is back and sitting comfortably on my right shoulder.
Because that's where he always sits. Sitting on my shoulder, holding my hand back from writing. Nothing of any worth comes forth. Nothing that I can use or like.
My words are failing on their way out. They get lost in transit.
I have nothing to say.
Nothing to contribute.
I am worthless without my words.
At least I feel that way.
"A poet is not at all poetical. He is the most unpoetical thing in existence. He has no identity. He is continually filling some other body."
I recently went to a Manchester Orchestra concert and it made me stop and realize how much I have missed going to rock shows. I've been hitting up some small venue shows at the Space, which I love, but there is just something about a rock show in some seedy hall with a bar at the back and some idiot in the pit who's so high that he can't compute the fact that no one wants him to touch them.
So I've decided to begin trolling around the internet to find some concerts that I must attend this summer.
May:
10th The Blow @ The Space
22nd - Blues Traveler @ Toad's Place
25th - Imogen Heap @ Hammerstein Ballroom (NYC)
June:
1st - Anberlin, Terrible Things @ Toad's Place
17th - Regina Spektor @ Beacon Theatre (NYC)
18th - Thrice, Kevin Devine @ Toad's Place
July:
9th - Jack Johnson @ Comcast Theatre (Hartford)
11th - Warped Tour @ Comcast Theatre
22nd - Star Wars: A Musical Journey @ Mohegan Sun Arena
24th - Modest Mouse @ The Dome at Oakdale
27th - Paramore, Tegan and Sara, New Found Glory @ Oakdale Theatre (Wallingford)
August:
3rd - Kings of Leon (!) @ Comcast Theatre
6th - O.A.R. @ PNC Bank Arts Center (NYC)
7th - John Mayer and Train @ Comcast
12th - Green Day with AFI @ Comcast
More to be added soon...
Something about the Mamas and the Papas that make me wish for a simpler life. One that is filled with guitar music and soft spoken words filled with wonder and love. Doesn't that sound loverly? So wonderful a thought such as this. Somewhere where no hateful words are spoken, no careless actions undertaken and no one is lonely. Not that this is really a possibility... But wouldn't it be nice?
Sitting here in my school because the thought of being home on this beautiful day seemed wrong. Although, leaving the inside of my house for the inside of my school building isn't much of an improvement.
What is it about sunny days that make us want to be outside? It's like a part of our bodies, this need to be out. Out there, enjoying the day, the sunshine, the warm air, the birds chirping. It's in our DNA. I think it's in our very soul.
It's our very souls that need to go outside and worship the God that gave us this wonderful, sad, beautiful, tragic world. Our very bones cry out to give Him praise. Whether or not a person believes in that sort of thing, it's undeniable to those who can see it through His glasses.
There's a way to look at such things as people. A certain perspective everyone has that shapes the corneas almost. Our view on the world is the way that we see everyone. This isn't news, but the interesting thing about this notion is how vast the differences between people can be. It makes me wonder. Sometimes I can just sit and wonder about it for a while. How incredibly different that two separate people can look at the same thing.
What a think that thought is!
Just listened to the song "Belated Promise Ring" by Iron and Wine. My name is in that song, it makes me happy. Also, it seems to fit with my personality.
Now, if only I can find a man to buy me a promise ring....
Ramble posts seem to be my way of blogging. Just open the page and type whatever comes to mind. Sometimes I have a purpose in it, but mostly, not.
It's about that time again. The olympic winter games is playing in the background as I'm typing this. Every time it shows up, this time in Vancouver, it always makes me want to be an athlete. I wish I was a wicked awesome snowboarder. In fact, it was the 2002 games that made me take snowboard lessons that one time. It didn't go well. I do not do well with things I can't pick up right away.
Speed skating is another thing I enjoy watching during the games.
Apolo Anton Ohno will have me rooting for him when he skates in the coming races.
There is also an American speed skater by the name of Rebekah Bradford. She has the coolest name ever, so I will be rooting for her. Us Rebekah's need to stick together. Also, she studied psychology in school. Amazing what you can find on the internet.
And figure skating. I love figure skating.
But the main thing I love about the olympic games, is the fact that they're games.
They're games that people from all over the world play together. It brings to mind the notion of a worldwide game of tag, or hide and seek, or sardines. Freeze tag! Can you imagine?? I love starting the game of tag, the only problem is the fact that I seem to be the only one. I start it, and eventually someone finishes it, after a pathetic trip around a small circle of people. No one wants to be the freak to tag a stranger. I admit, not even myself sometimes. Though I have been known to.
But with the olympics, everyone wants to play, or watch. Worldwide coverage of the games is key, as everyone wants to root for their team. Everyone wants their country to win and they all have their favorite athlete. It's a unifying factor in our world that desperately needs to be connected.
I know this is an overly romantic view of this event, but I like it. It makes all this seem worth it. Without the thought that this connects us, it can all just seem like a waste of money we should be spending on something more worthwhile.
So, I'm keeping my happy world view of the olympics. And going back to watching speed skating.
Go USA!
